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Countdown to Kickoff 2019: Los Angeles Galaxy
Basic InfoFounded: 1996 (1994 on paper)
Years Active in MLS: Most of them
Years Passive in MLS: 2006, 2008, 2016-2018
Nicknames: Blue White and Gold, G’s, Los Galacticos (most common: G’s)
Stadium: Dignity Health Sports Park, Carson CA (established 2003; renamed 2019)
Club Owner / Operator: Anschutz Entertainment Group
Club President: Chris Klein
Head Coach: Guillermo Barros Schelotto
USL Affiliate: LA Galaxy II, a.k.a. ‘G2’ a.k.a. ‘Los Dos’
First Team Captain: Zlatan Ibrahimović
Club History: As one of the founding members of Major League Soccer the Los Angeles Galaxy has a deep and established place in the heart of the American sport. Definitively the league’s most decorated and famous club, it has built its reputation through a series of high-profile celebrity player signings and innovative sporting strategy. Many of MLS’s now lauded evolutionary steps were pioneered by or in response to the infamous superclub ambition of the LA Galaxy.
2019 RosterGOALKEEPERS: 1 David Bingham / 41 Justin Vom Steeg / Matt Lampson
DEFENDERS: 3 Diego Polenta / 4 Dave Romney / 5 Daniel Steres / 16 Jorgen Skjelvik / 20 Tomas Hilliard-Arce / 21 Hugo Arellano / 25 Rolf Feltscher
MIDFIELDERS: 2 Perry Kitchen / 7 Romain Alessandrini / 8 Jonathan dos Santos / 14 Servando Carrasco / 17 Sebastian Lletget / 18 Uriel Antuna / 24 Emmanuel Boateng / 26 Efrain Alvarez
FORWARDS: 9 Zlatan Ibrahimović / 10 Giovani dos Santos / 11 Ola Kamara / 19 Chris Pontius
Predicted Starting Formation and XI: 4-4-2
Kamara Ibrahimović Antuna Pontius J. Dos Santos Alessandrini Skjelvik Polenta Steres Feltscher Bingham
2018 Season ReviewAt some point near the end of 2016 after the departure of head coach Bruce Arena the chief executives of the Los Angeles Galaxy, President Chris Klein and General Manager Pete Vagenas, embarked upon a series of season-long experiments usually undertaken by Football Manager gamers with a sense for the absurd. Following 2017’s experiment of putting Giovani dos Santos in front of Jermaine Jones and a youth reserve squad and the subsequent worst season in club history they went into 2018 with a new idea “What if we take the worst team in MLS and give them one of the best players in the world?”
Result: The greatest bad team of the year, a chaotic and frustrating goalercoaster that came within one win of making MLS Cup playoffs only to stick the landing with a season-ending 200 dB shart.
Meanwhile for years supporters raised unheeded warnings about the coming expansion team known as Los Angeles Football Club, a cross-town iceberg directly in the path of the SS Galaxy. Even billionaire oligarch Phillip Anschutz has realized almost too late that the ship needs an emergency evasive turn.
Enter the 2019 experiment of the LA Galaxy: “What if we take last year’s team and give them one of those tough South American coaches?”
Under New ManagementKlein and Vagenas have self-exiled to the boardroom and taking the helm is new General Manager Dennis Te Kloese. An actual sports management director is back in charge of the competitive-playing side of the business. The Admiral is on the bridge; all hands prepare for soccer!
In what is the LA Galaxy’s most significant offseason roster change they have acquired the brain trust of Argentine powerhouse and back-to-back Superliga champions Club Atlético Boca Juniors, led by head coach Guillermo Barros Schelotto, assistant coach Gustavo (his twin brother) and chief trainer / painsmith Javier Valdecantos; plus an assortment of sinister CONMEBOL henchmen.
The Galaxy’s new ‘Boca Norte’ regime deserves a closer look.
PERFORMANCE COACH: Javier Valdecantos
The most interesting torturer in the world. Nicknamed ‘The Butcher' and/or 'The Assassin' Valdecantos is known for his ruthless fitness regimen gleaned from over 26 years of experience in Argentina, Uruguay, Paraguay, Mexico and Spain. The Assassin began his career as the personal trainer to Diego Maradona so there’s a good chance his character might show up in the next season of Netflix’s ‘NARCOS’.
A student of progressive sports science as well as old-fashioned cruelty, he implements cutting-edge tools and methods to hone player skills. Reportedly it is Valdecantos who has the final say in preseason friendly match roster selection. Despite his reputation he is a passionate player advocate and Galaxy team members are singing his praises in interviews. Ola Kamara, if you’re reading this blink twice if you want us to call the police.
ASSISTANT COACH: Gustavo Barros Schelotto
Buy one GBS and get the other for free. From what can be seen Gustavo appears to be the brother more involved with field training. After the February 9th 1-1 preseason friendly against Toronto FC he brought the team back out and ran them through post-match drills much to the satisfaction of Galaxy fans. You get at them, Gustavo; Saturday nights at the bar are for winners!
ASSISTANT COACH: Dominic Kinnear
Somehow the former San Jose Earthquakes and interim 2018 Galaxy coach—he of the infamous Decision Day choke job—has managed to remain a part of the coaching staff. A well-liked presence in the locker room, Kinnear’s focus will be on coordinating the Galaxy defense. Yeah moving on…
GENERAL MANAGER: Dennis Te Kloese
The former youth director for the Mexican National Team and before that an obscure Carson-based MLS franchise, DTK as G’s fans nicknamed him is charged with building professional rosters for all of the Los Angeles Galaxy teams. Gone is the era when the FO would cold-call European sports agents and ask which 2nd-Division washouts want to make almost a million dollars a year scoring own-golazos in sunny Los Angeles.
On his first day Dennis turned on a garden hose and shooed away all of the greasy hucksters loitering outside the corporate offices waiting for the next opportunity to steal the club’s precious TAM.
HEAD COACH: Guillermo Barros Schelotto
In line with Uncle Phil’s mandate to upgrade the LA Galaxy to MLS 3.0 certification the front office has hired the obligatory flashy championship-winning coach: 2008 MLS Cup champion (as a player) Guillermo Barros Schelotto. An intense and driven taskmaster on the rebound after a devastating Copa Libertadores loss, the former Boca Juniors coach is looking to bring his demanding standards to the city of sloth and traffic.
Team chemistry is key for the 2019 team as much as it was the kryptonite of the 2018 season. On the field the LA Galaxy speaks five languages—Spanish, English, French, Norwegian, and Bingham—but the lingua franca remains a pantomime of angry faces and pointing gestures at open spaces on the pitch. Teaching these players how to communicate plays will be GBS’s biggest challenge.
Offseason Roster ChangesThe core of the 2018 team remains for the 2019 season but a few adjustments have been made.
|OUT||Ashley Cole||The Galaxy’s veteran left back and Team Captain has returned to England to retire on the beaches of Derby County whilst playing for a local ‘football’ club.|
|OUT||Michael Ciani||Former center back Ciani has gone to live on a nice farm upstate. No further questions.|
|OUT||Baggio Husidic||A long-term member of the G’s roster whose option expired, midfielder Husidic briefly joined a preseason camp with a local team before being released.|
|OUT||Ariel Lassiter||Galaxy reserve forward and Los Dos mainstay Lassiter was released in December and signed by Costa Rican club Alajuense.|
|OUT||Sheanon Williams||Emergency summer signing and warm body the Galaxy could stuff into its depleted backline, defender Sheanon Williams was released at the end of the 2018 season.|
|OUT||Brian Sylvestre||A 3rd choice goalkeeper who may or may not have appeared with Los Dos.|
|OUT ON LOAN||Joao Pedro||Oof. Once-promising midfielder turned Los Dos benchwarmer turned repeat loanee Joao Pedro is being moved around the world so that the G’s can use his international roster spot. His last known location was CD Tondela in Portugal.|
|OUT ON LOAN||Bradford Jamieson IV||Once considered a rising star in the Bruce Arena years, this injury-ravaged Attacking Midfielder is on his way to San Antonio FC in the USL.|
|IN||Matt Lampson||David Bingham being David Bingham, the Galaxy might need a backup goalkeeper. I don’t know why they didn’t just keep that one good one. Magee something or other.|
|IN||Diego Polenta||The first flexing of the international clout of GBS. See his entry elsewhere.|
|IN ON LOAN||Uriel Antuna||The first flexing of the international clout of DTK. See his entry elsewhere.|
|IN||Juninho||Everybody has that one well-worn article of clothing they slip into when they want to feel comfortable. Fan favorite depth midfielder Ju-Ju-Juninho is the G’s old sweatpants and it’s good to wear him again, nevermind the Chicago smell.|
In addition there are a few young prospects on the bubble of getting a contract.
|USL Team||Emil Cuello||19th choice pick in the 2019 MLS SuperDraft, 22-year old SMU midfielder Emil Cuello has impressed in preseason matches against Toronto FC and Atlanta United.|
|USL Team||Don Tchilao||36th choice pick in the 2019 MLS SuperDraft, 22-year old Oregon State forward Tchilao is destined for Los Dos. What, you think a college boy’s gonna take Zlatan’s job?|
|First Team||Diedie Traore||A young left back from France who impressed in last year’s open tryouts, the Galaxy II standout might be upgraded to the seniors for position depth.|
|First Team||Julian Araujo||This poor kid. He thinks this is his big break… and it is, the doomed fool; because Julian Araujo is a right back, a backup right back, and it is the most injury-cursed of all of the Galaxy’s positions. For him Hell will no longer hold any surprises.|
Key PlayersZlatan Ibrahimović – Forward (Team Captain)
If you thought Galaxy fans would stop worshipping Zlatan, think again.
Last season’s temperamental savior and this year’s Team Captain has been placated with a renewed investment from Uncle Phil—personally with a new Designated Player contract of $7.5 million per year and clubwise with new coaches and a less-embarrassing squad of teammates. Zlatan didn’t come to America to fill his trophy cabinet with ‘Arizona Iced Tea™ Mucho Mango MLS Soccer Dude of the Week’ Awards. Whatever our league considers a championship he wants to own.
The Risk: Sophomore seasons from UEFA vets rarely fare well for the Galaxy. Both Steven Gerrard and Jelle Van Damme fell apart in their second year with the G’s, the former from age and the latter from homesickness / SoCal’s low-level atmospheric ennui. David Beckham in 2009 publicly begged A.C. Milan not to send him back to the filthy troglodytes in Los Angeles (we showed him, with a statue).
With Ibra the risk is he could get hit with any or all of the 2nd-year maladies.
The Reward: Once Europe flushed away Becks he put work into the Galaxy and earned his toys. Ibrahimović, already rejected abroad, is in the post-Milan Beckham phase of his career and dedicated to MLS. If his body holds up the Galaxy have an entire season’s worth of the services of a world-class icon.
Romain Alessandrini - Winger
The Platonic ideal of an LA Galaxy player, beloved-by-fans “Alessandreamy” combines hustle, grace, love for the crest, sharp passing and a hint of flair balanced with a certain hard-nosed strength.
2017’s silver lining spent 2018 in an emotional struggle with injuries and the bench, emerging at the end with his starting place returned but his Designated Player status jeopardized by Giovani dos Santos’s contract intrigues. If the Galaxy can hold onto Romain no one will benefit more from his presence than Zlatan Ibrahimović. Dreamy is literally God’s wingman.
Uriel Antuna - Winger
The benefit of hiring the youth director of the Mexican National Team as General Manager is that he comes already prepared to supply a Los Angeles soccer franchise with one of its most sought-after commodities. Meet Te Kloese’s first catch: 21-year old Manchester City prospect and El Tri hopeful Uriel Antuna, here in MLS on a season-long loan after doing a two-year stint with FC Groningen in the Dutch Eredivisie.
Simply put, from what we saw in the Toronto FC game DTK is stunting on his bosses by getting a rent-to-own 2020 TAM star and 2021 LigaMX payday.
Antuna is fast. With speeds approaching Ema Boateng levels alongside ball control skills at “way better than Boateng” he already represents an upgrade to the attack on the wings. Chasing down loose balls with the confidence of a man walking into Del Taco holding five dollars and making recovery tackles with the kamikaze bravery of that same man placing an order, Antuna’s chief weakness seems to be a lack of individual creativity once he gets in the opponent’s penalty box. Maybe time, coaching and chemistry with the forwards will unlock that final piece.
On the vast confetti-strewn plains of the Digs Antuna will be lethal. The human equivalent of a Macho Combo Burrito seasoned with ‘Del Scorcho’ sauce will punish on the transitions and provide fire to both ends.
Ola Kamara - Forward
The Art Garfunkel of LA’s ‘Simon & Garfunkel’ front two. It is patently unfair to dismiss Ola Kamara’s achievements, him being part of a strike duo with a combined over 500 goals and regular appearances in the UEFA Champions League.
Kamara’s talents as a goal poacher who sneaks into spaces deep inside the penalty box were largely unexploited during last year’s season (he did have his moments ). However this year with the inclusion of one Uriel Antuna on the left the Galaxy’s Norwegian Ninja might have found an assist-giving Garfunkel of his own. Count on Kamara improving upon his goal tally.
Giovani dos Santos - Attacking Midfielder
For the past two seasons midfield goldbricker Giovani dos Santos has been living out the plotline to the 1999 film ‘OFFICE SPACE’, about a corporate drone who stops caring about his workplace responsibilities and is subsequently promoted up the hierarchy.
To those who call these accusations unfounded here is my proof.
|Year||Apps||Minutes||Goals||Asst||$ per G+A|
Meanwhile the Galaxy scored 61 league goals without him. His shift was being covered by Chris Pontius, Sebastian Lletget and his brother Jonathan dos Santos leaving him free to enjoy the Los Angeles lifestyle. With one year left on his contract he came into the offseason ready to sign an extension.
There’s just one problem: Zlatan Ibrahimović (22G, 10A, $699.95 per minute) wanted a raise and the divine avatar of testosterone needed a D.P. spot to go with it; and since the Galaxy made $63 million last year largely on the back of Ibra they were going to give him the D.P. spot. Giovani’s spot.
The rumor is Gio’s father tried to shop his son around LigaMX and got shot down. Journalists covering the Galaxy beat say the FO then offered to buy down Alessandrini’s D.P. contract with TAM to open the spot and Dreamy refused as a matter of pride (‘OFFICE SPACE’ callback: “No way! Why should I change? He’s the one who sucks.”). News reports state AEG has authorized the Galaxy to pay Dos Santos for the last year of his contract and cut him loose. And then came the whispers… of a ‘contract restructuring’.
Like an A-hole Jesus miraculously breaking one loaf of bread into a multitude of turds Giovani dos Santos has offered to restructure the last year of his $6 million D.P. contract into a 4-year, $1.5 million TAM extension. And the Galaxy seem ready to eat it.
Nobody but Gio—who’s made $17 million in MLS and plays soccer as a hobby--wants this deal. Franchise owners are outraged. It could blow up negotiations with the players’ union. Galaxy fans are cycling through the stages of grief and looking for omens in billboards and merchandise webpages. The league stands once more on the brink of chaos ready to condemn another LA-induced ‘rules innovation’. And the season begins in one week.
Hopefully this entire entry is completely irrelevant By March 1st. If not, Zlatan help us all.
Diego Polenta – Center Back
At long last the Galaxy may have found their defensive leader. Allow me to introduce you to the manimal responsible for making the G’s look like a professional team. Welcome to big boy country.
For once when the Galaxy say a player is an “international veteran” it isn’t a euphemism for older than dirt. 27-year old Uruguayan defender Diego ‘Patrón’ Polenta honed his skills for 6 years in Italy’s Serie B before going home to double-fist trophies with Nacional de Montevideo. The thinking man’s Hulk reportedly turned down lucrative offers from Leeds United and Club Atlas to embark upon a six-month Landon Donovacation into the countryside to clear his head, train and ponder what is the measure of a man.
For Galaxy Coach Guillermo Barros Schelotto, in need of a first-rate center back, only man’s absolute unit of measurement would suffice. Patrón answered the call.
Unfortunately Valdecantos is still reforging Diego’s match fitness but what has been witnessed so far is hype fuel. Polenta is a calming presence in the backline giving teammates the freedom to push ahead. Less a meat cleaver and more a Ginsu knife he can gently slice the ball from his opponent with a single quiet step. We’ll have to wait to see him saw through the metaphorical lead pipe.
He also commands his personal space with the fortitude of an experienced CONMEtooBOL survivor. Note to other teams: This year you won’t score on the Galaxy via aggravated sexual assault.
The big man has a big brain and an uncanny vision to spot opposing plays rarely found in Galaxy defenders. Daniel Steres believes Diego has “the shining”.
Jorgen Skjelvik – Left Back
Every season there’s one Galaxy player who makes unhappy fans eat their words. The ‘Suck It, Haters!’ MVP of last year was Chris Pontius; this year the betting money is on defender Jorgen Skjelvik.
Forming an ill-matched CB partnership with Michael Ciani last year Skjelvik, who reportedly played left back for 3 years in Norway, always looked confused and unhappy. “Dette er ikke min posisjon,” Jorgen insisted, a statement repeated by center forward turned left winger Ola Kamara. Everyone assumed it was a traditional Norwegian greeting.
With Ashley Cole gone it seems the G’s have no choice but to make a left back play at left back. And guess what: Skjelvik might be okay at left back. Jorgen now looks more confident on the ball and is pressing up the field overlapping with Antuna. He should have a much happier 2019 and make all of his doubters look like fools. Folks, Rosetta Stone works.
Best Case ScenarioLast year’s squad, saddled with injuries and suspicious pre-World Cup ‘injuries’, was ranked 17th in MLS for shots but 3rd for goals scored; if you took out penalty goals the Galaxy were 2nd. In regular season games the G’s were held scoreless only three times, the same as Atlanta United and LAFC. LA’s success rate of shots on goal to goals scored: 38%. Unrivaled.
Zlatan’s “I am a lion” shtick is modesty; in the wild they only hunt at a 25% kill rate.
All of that firepower is coming back. Now imagine instead of 17th for shots taken the Galaxy are 10th or even 4th. That would be an 80 goal season.
MLS is a league where momentum wins and nothing builds momentum more than a new coach. The sky is the limit for the LA Galaxy: Shield, Cup, impotent tears of haters and the rebirth of a dynasty.
Worst Case ScenarioLook, I’m not going to defend the LA Galaxy’s 2018 season… and neither would the players. Major League Soccer’s ultimate ‘mullet team’ (business up front, party in the back) sent balls flying into nets in both directions. I’m not joking, they scored 66 goals and their GD was +2.
Half of that loser defense is also coming back. And the team has no depth.
Worse case, drama tears apart the franchise. Polenta goes hard on one of the crybaby teams and gets a media-induced suspension a la Nigel de Jong. Fallout from Giovani’s contract dispute distracts Jonathan dos Santos or Alessandrini has to be sold last-minute. The May gauntlet (8 games in 35 days including away at NY, Columbus, Orlando and KC) ruins player health. God suffers the unthinkable injury. July’s ‘Rivalry Month’ sees up to three opportunities for trouble with supporters of San Jose and LAFC creating a lingering negative atmosphere. The August schedule is a murderer’s row of 1-point results. LA crashes below the playoff line for a third straight season and Beckham’s statue demands to go to Madrid.
Likely OutcomeSchelotto’s first season sees the Galaxy 3rd or 4th in the west and almost winning conference semifinals, screwed by the single-leg format. The experiment shows promise and he gears up for the true title challenge in the 2020 season. Consider this year GBS’s warning to the league.
FandomSubreddit: LAGalaxy | Podcasts: Corner of the Galaxy; Straight From The Stands; The Riot Squadcast; LA Is Our House
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I wanted to go ahead and make my own post to give background & context for what I already know, how I best learn, my goals & time frame, etc.
English is my first language, and although I did very well in spanish in HS & college, I am not fluent in any other language besides english. However, I have always wanted to learn french (for various reasons) & I decided to begin the journey toward fluency earlier this year. Upon reading that it is "possible" to become fluent in a language in ~6mos if you put your mind to it and study accordingly, I made the goal to be able to watch any movie in french with only french subtitles and be able to understand the majority of what is going on and what is being said by Christmas. (My ultimate goal is of course to eventually become fluent to the point I can have a spoken conversation in french and follow along with ease, but the movie one was just my 6 month goal). Well, some life hiccups happened and I don't think I'm going to make my movie goal, but I want to get back on track.
Heres what I had been doing: Youtube videos that go over basic french grammar & greetings & whatnot, Duolingo, I tried reading some stories in french but havent done much of that in awhile as it was difficult. I feel like I need a better understanding of the language before tackling stories? I tried talking to some people in french on some language apps, but that wasnt very helpful in teaching me fundamentals. They spoke in mostly "text talk" & found myself having to google everything because what I had been trying to teach myself was very different than the conversations we were having. Also, might be helpful to note that podcasts are my least favorite way to study as it is difficult for me to concentrate on them
Concerns: I got to a point where I felt like I was spinning my wheels. I wasn't really advancing in any area and was unsure of what I should be focusing on when and for how long. I also find it much easier to read french than I do to speak it, or worse yet, listen to it. My listening comprehension is very poor, even for words/sentences I already feel that I know well. I would really like to improve that, but overall, i feel like I need some direction and a guide on what/how I should be studying to more efficiently accomplish my goals. (Given I’m at a beginner level)
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